Stop the presses. Not long after Lee Stranahan became my new best friend with a payment of $28.95, Constantine Pateras showed me who really cares by sending me 50 dollars. I realized that I never really hit it off with Lee in the 12 hours of our friendship. I mean, we're still friends and all but not like I am with my newest best friend Constantine. Man, the times we're gonna have. Skipping stones, strangling call-girls, paint-balling call-girls, graduating high school, macing call-girls, holding each others hair while we pee, hording firewood and all. Chicks will come and go but your best friend will always be there until someone makes a better offer.

The first in-studio taping of the Man Show is tomorrow, Saturday, May 10th. We'll be taping every other Saturday thru July 19th so if you're in Los Angeles and want to come to the show, Man Show Tickets. I'm so giddy I could almost throw up blood.

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[ New best friend must outbid $50.00. ]

Update: Fri, 09 May 2003 11:21:46

Phil the Stalker sent in $29.95 a bit too late to ever have commanded best friend status, as he was unknowingly beat out by my best friend Constantine's whopping 50 dollars. Phil is an actual stalker of my co-host Joe Rogan and, once again, I have to take his sloppy seconds. But a deal is a deal so welcome my second best friend, Phil the Stalker.